Faith chooses to obey God when it absolutely makes no sense

Sometimes God speaks to us when we are simply minding our own business.  I was driving east on Interstate 20 in Columbia, SC last May when I began to see signs.  Literally!  There were multiple billboards rising like mountains above the highway, advertising going “back to school.” Some of them advertised online degrees and others advertised graduate school.

Many exit signs pointed the way to local colleges and universities.

obey GodI saw so many of them in just a few miles of travel that I began to wonder if God was speaking to me through the signs.

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At one point I looked at an electronic billboard to the left of the highway, and, no joke, it changed before my eyes to a sign advertising going back to school.  Talk about surreal.

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When you can’t see your future, just close your eyes

I met with my mentor this past week. We meet monthly over coffee and we talk about my family, my health, and ministry, among other things. I knew this month that I needed a lot of her wisdom. Do you know that she has all of her wisdom teeth? No wonder she is a wise woman.

When she asked about ministry, I just sighed. I have a blog, but I am tired of its name. I’m a writer, but I don’t feel like writing. I’ve been trying to spearhead a speaking ministry for three years, but no churches are calling with invitations. And I start seminary this month.

Mostly, I’m confused. When I envision my future, this is all I can see:

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How to rest when your life feels out of control

I live my life by a spreadsheet that tells me what to do each day. It tells me my chores, the phone calls I need to make, what time I need to leave to make it to the doctors office on time, what errands to run, what friends I need to text, and when to rest. Every night I make my schedule for the following day, and the next day I just follow the plan.

My life has been much the same way. I graduated from high school and went off to college. Then I graduated from college and got a job. Next I got engaged, then married and had 2.0 children. I became a stay at home mom and homeschooled them. Then they went to college and left me…with an empty nest.

And with absolutely no plan for what to do next.

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Have the storms of life left you dismayed?

I quietly rolled over in bed, trying not to wake up my husband. We were on vacation, and I was doing my darnedest to let him sleep until 7 am. So I did what I usually do when I awake early: think and pray. I prayed for friends who were struggling, friends who were sick, and for family members who needed help.

Then I began to pray for my fledgling speaking ministry. As I prayed, I felt a familiar knot in the pit of my stomach. All of my hopes and aspirations were rolled up in that pang of uncertainty about my future.

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6 Keys to surviving your next crisis

The phone rang.  I was out working in the yard, enjoying my flowers, but I decided to run into the garage to grab it.  It was a friend in crisis calling for prayer, like many friends before her.  I found a quiet spot in the house to sit and fully listen to her story.  She had made a mistake on her taxes and potentially owed the government $13,000.  $13,000!  I did not know what to say, other than “Wow,” so I offered to pray for her.  And as I listened to Holy  Spirit and prayed for her, these keys for surviving a crisis emerged.

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Does your life demand more than you can possibly give?

I walked around my house chanting, “I am braver than I think.  I am braver than I think.”  I didn’t feel brave, but I was trying to convince myself that I was.  My heart was in my throat, and I felt sure that I was going to have a panic attack. My 18 year old son wanted to drive to a friend’s house for the first time.  The friend’s house was on a busy city street that was near “the projects” on the other side of the railroad tracks. And it was dark outside.  I was desperately trying to be brave, but all I could envision was him being lost in the city in the dark in the projects.  I was an emotional mess.

trust

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